Info

Widows in India struggle without the love of God

By South Asia news staff

In India, marriage is important. The day a daughter is born her parents begin saving for her dowry and planning her wedding. Young girls are taught that marriage will be their chance for a better life. For most, it is; yet, many marriages are cut short when the husband dies. The once joyous bride instantly finds herself a widow in mourning.

“Mara”* married into a family much wealthier than her own. Plans for a good life spun dreamily in her mind, and she had stars in her eyes as her groom whisked her off to Singapore for a honeymoon. Her dreams were shattered, however, when doctors diagnosed her husband with pancreatic cancer.

Mara, a Hindu, spent all of her husband’s money paying doctors’ bills, and she placed the last of her marriage gold on her husband’s body so that he might purchase passage from evil spirits in the afterlife. Her wealthy in-laws refused to help her. Still young and beautiful, Mara and her two toddler sons – the younger of whom was born shortly after his father’s death – were forced to live in the concrete shell of an unfinished building. Mara does not know that the living God is a defender of widows.

India has more than 1 billion people. Many are widows who, like Mara, have no hope of a better future unless someone introduces them to Jesus and they accept Him as their Savior and bridegroom.

“In this culture, there is a certain amount of shame and superstition surrounding a widow,” one Last Frontier worker explains. “Pregnant women and those preparing for marriage will avoid visiting widows.”

“Syeda”* is a Deccani Muslim whose husband died in March after a long illness.

“Since the funeral, she has remained in her home. She cannot even go out onto her porch. She cannot see any men, with the exception of close blood relatives,” writes a worker in South Asia who has befriended Syeda. “A widow is required to remain in isolation for four months and 10 days to ensure that if she becomes pregnant, there will be no question whether the child belongs to her husband, and thus there will be no question about her honor. Because she now shoulders the financial responsibility, however, she (Syeda) will only need to remain in isolation for 40 days.”

Syeda has three teenagers and now must work as the family’s primary breadwinner.

“Once she begins to go out for work again, she faces a dilemma of what to wear,” Syeda’s friend writes.

When he was living, Syeda’s husband did not require Syeda to wear the modest black covering that many Muslim women wear. Now neighbors are encouraging Syeda to wear it so she does not “give other men wrong ideas, as she no longer has a man in authority over her.”

Syeda’s friend has told Syeda about the love of Jesus, but Syeda has yet to place her faith in Jesus and submit to His authority.

“Tsering”* is a feisty grandmother who lives in the capital city of India and has been a widow for many years. A Tibetan Buddhist, Tsering sells polished rocks and trinkets of silver and brass that she believes bring protection and good fortune to her customers. One western customer said she has shopped with Tsering ever since Tsering befriended her on a train two decades ago and insisted that the she stay in Tsering’s home rather than in a hotel.

Cataracts now cover Tsering’s eyes, so she rarely ventures far from her shop anymore, and she usually makes her bed on the shop’s floor when she needs rest. Tsering’s children and grandchildren live in the Himalaya Mountains in northern India, but Tsering seldom visits them. She said she fears her customers will worry about her welfare if her shop is not open. None of Tsering’s family has relocated to Delhi to care for Tsering.

Tsering is a giving person, but as a Buddhist, her faith is in her giving. She does not understand that God gave His only Son to pay the price for her sins.

Like Mara, “Harum”* lost her husband to illness at a young age. Yet, unlike Mara, the family of Harum’s husband took her and her son into their home. Her son has grown to a man and has learned much about the family’s travel agency. Harum is treated with respect and love, but she does not hear the truth about Jesus in the home of her husband’s Kashmiri Muslim family. She knows Jesus only as one prophet among many. She has no idea that Jesus came as Savior to clothe her in His righteousness and that He longs to rejoice over her.

In their youths, Mara, Syeda, Tsering, and Harum likely had fairytale dreams of marriage, yet they now all struggle daily with the devastation and hardship that losing a husband brings, especially in India. Even those like Harum who have family all around them experience deep loneliness. God longs for the widows of India – those like Mara, Syeda, Tsering, and Harum – to know the love of His Son and become a part of His family as the bride of Christ.

“With the death of my dear Muslim friend’s husband, I have seen firsthand the grief of those who have no hope,” writes Syeda’s friend. “Please pray for the many widows who have not yet heard of the free gift of salvation made available to all through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Ask that they may find the hope that He alone gives.”

* Names have been changed to protect the identity of those interviewed.

Editor’s note: The widows of India are only one segment of the many peoples living in South Asia who need your prayers. May 1, and the first day of every month, has been set aside as a Day of Prayer and Fasting for the peoples of South Asia. One sixth of the world’s population lives in South Asia – India, Nepal, Bhutan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, the Maldives and Pakistan. If you would like more information on how you can pray for the peoples of South Asia, please write to AsiaSouth@pobox.com.

For more information about South Asia, please write to go2southasia@pobox.com or visit http://imb.org/southasia and and http://peopleteams.org